The first page of my diary

When I was small I was reading the article ..written by some other person,,,and was thinking why I am not able to think like that.???why I am not able to write like that???time was moving by his own wish….i was having no interest in those articles…..but as I have been gone through journey of my life I met him …….i was not known he was writer too….when we used to talk on phone he came to know that I am interested in writing..he gave me one link and told me go through it……

There will be one option over there in right hand side of the page ,it was search option

I was so foolish that time that I does not have any knowledge of blogs and forum ………he told me write my name in this option……I have done the same ……..when I have gone through that I found full list of so many post…I started reading ….there…..it was the time when I started to read him……..those words was not just simple words for me I was feeling like I am living those moments on my own ...he was on line with me on other call…guiding me how to go ahead……..

He said read loudly I want to hear that ..i have done that….. when I have completed one post..i said ….ohhhhh what’s this? why your name is written over here …?

Its written by you ???he said yes …..i was feeling so proud wwwwwwww its my love………..feeling like am so special person of this world …..that he is with me ….

I become a fan of him ..whenever he was writing a single word either on mail ,on forum or in my msg I used to save that ..beacause I love that

Though those post was written by him but that was for his love who was not there in his life …sometimes he was saying today I want to read that post of mine ..as he was apart from city not able to access the net ….i was the messenger for him……I told him don’t worry I’ll do….

I was reading those post with my cheerful smile for him as he was on call he was not able to look at me …but whenever I read those post that made me so crying there was tears in my eyes and smile on my face for him..still I have done because he want to listen that ……..he was writing for her always and I was saving all post as a precious things of mine….

When he was not with me I used to go on that page that was his family for me ..i was doing nothing just reading only his post then go back…. though he was not with me i was having that feeling that I am coming in his family talking with all members..and living my life with him ……those moments made me so complete not wishing anything for my life

I was having intuition that soon there will one day when we will apart ..i told him I will made one blog for you whenever you want to write something write there only ..that will give immense pleasure for me …..and I will feel that you are still with me ………

There was first page in my diary that I always left blank because I said there will only one person in my life who will fill up that page..........i told him to fill up that but he didn’t …I don’t know why ….?????????

He said I will fill that when I will go …..but when that time came I told again he didn’t I don’t know why????

Still today the first page of my diary is blank that will always kept blank ..because no one can become front page of my life ….

Though he never loved me,he never missed me,i was not there in his life never,ever and any more but for me he is my life ever...i was not there in any of his words but Still his page has become pleasant memory for me ..that dedicated for my love ………
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luv u